The Parenting Hack To Get You Through Anxious Days
The truth is, there is no perfect way or ultimate hack to get you through parenting.
I cant count how many times i have wondered if this parenting thing is really my life and if i am really screwing it up.
My life is far from perfect.
Parenting is no joke!
I yell at my kids and we eat cereal for dinner far more often than I would like to admit.
As I now have a 6 almost 7 year old son, a 4 year old super sassy daughter, and a one year old boss baby— it’s impossible to not freak out a little bit sometimes.
The cool thing about our little family though, is that we all get each other.
The parenting hack to get you through in my opinion and experience, is honesty.
Yes, we are honest with our kids about a lot.
No, this doesn’t mean that we share every intimate detail with our children. But, when the energy is off in the household and its extremely apparent, i don’t want my kids wondering about what it possibly could be.
Being an honest person has always been much easier for me, more so than a hack i have had to learn to acquire.
Rather than getting upset and just yelling at my kids or being noticeably angry or sad for what seems like no reason to them; i would rather apologize for when I’m being an angry mama bear and let them know it has nothing to do with them.
Sometimes just giving them an understanding as to what made me that way is enough for them to realize that mama just needs a little help.
It’s hard to hide much of anything when you have a curious child.
Not only that, but our kids are always listening.
No matter how hard they try to pretend like their not, they are. And every specific situation they are learning something about life, about me, and about themselves. And i really don’t ever want them to think that they are the cause of my own emotional issues.
It’s our job, or at least I feel like it is, to find a parenting hack that works for us. To help them understand things for what they are.
In the last 5 years my children have really had to learn how to be independent. Of course they still have me; But due to me being as busy as i am, my children have figured a lot out on their own. And they are comfortable with my husband and i not doing every little thing for them.
They learned to be OK with it because they are starting to understand life in a much bigger sense.
Obviously, there are things that we do not share with our kids because not everything is for their ears. However, we do share with them whats going on when they can tell something is going on.
Leaving my kids in the dark never turns out good for any of us.
They, like me, like to know whats going on. And even thought it gets really frustrating at times having to explain so many things, i know its all for the benefit of their future. Patience is a hack i have been working on with myself since i started my own parenting journey.
I am just the type of person (even as an adult) that wants things done when i want them done.
Of course this has portrayed onto my oldest child. He heard those words come from me the most. “hurry up”.
I’ve really learned since he was about 4 or 5 and one day had asked me why i was in such a hurry, and i didn’t have an answer.
Since then, we as a family have been working on slowing down, talking with each other more, and being honest about whats going on: always. We have never had consistent help with our kids and if at all it was very minimal.
It’s always just been us.
Parenting is easily one of the hardest things i have ever done.
Its not just what you see on social media.
But they do know that I’m doing my best, and they know their dad is too. That’s really the best we can do.
I don’t ever want my kids to think that i have it all together because i honestly never do.
I embrace the fact that we learn things together and we go through life together.
The things we go through in life aren’t always meant to break us. The goal is to keep moving forward and to find what works for you and your own family.
The pressure we sometimes feel from change can get uncomfortable, but the outcome is always worth it.
If we start to teach our kids that these things in life are normal and give them the tools to get through the hard times; I’m almost positive it will be easier for them to endure the hardships the older they get.
How long has it taken you to be real with anyone else, let alone, yourself? We need to be real with our kids now and moving forward.
Our kids are our future and we need to treat them as such. Giving them that head start in life can impact their life in such a positive way.
Parenting is so much more effective when we are parenting with positive intention.
There is no guide book for parenting, and no book with a secret hack in it that will magically transform your life. But what there is out there, is hope, and faith, and trusting other people to influence your journey.